January 29, 2019 at 10:45 pm #327556
I’m hoping for some advice or words of encouragement please. I feel really low, drained and frustrated.
I’ve had no problems post surgery (TLH BSO) followed the recovery ‘milestones’-got lots of rest etc.
I was originally signed off work for 8 weeks and I’ve just seen OH who has, thankfully, given me more time.
I know everyones recovery is individual but I really expected to be feeling great at 8 weeks and I’m not.
I was quite active before, enjoyed running/gym, work f/t and manage busy house with 4 kids and countless activities. Now I’m trying to manage household chores, with rests in between. If I have a ‘busy’ day, like today, I feel sore and drained, which will probably continue into tomorrow!
My gp and husband both say things like ‘but your 8 weeks now’ which isn’t helpful and if one more person tells me how ‘well I look’ I might shout at them. I feel guilty for not feeling great and I’m beginning to wonder if I am making it up or being a hypochondriac! Can I be making myself worse?
Instead of dealing with the usual teatime dramas tonight when child 1 didn’t like her food etc etc I took myself up to bed and had a cry. Oh dear 😮
Thanks for reading, your comments or experiences will be appreciated XJanuary 30, 2019 at 3:03 am #327557
Dear Heyvik, I could have written so many of those sentences myself. I am also 9 weeks post SAH and feel very far from recovered or normal. I did have infection complications and an open wound until 2 weeks ago, so not an easy recovery I’ll admit. But now wound is finally healed and I should be feeling a lot better and I’m not.
I was making gradual progress with slowly increasing walks and tiny amounts of household tasks but have had to stop all that completely. I am sore and have terrible swollen tender tummy if I do more than ten minutes upright. How ridiculous.
It’s not nice to hear you’re suffering but so many people on here are just doing so well and it was a relief to hear of someone else being honest about finding it really tough. I agree that docs etc are mostly saying, well if there’s no obvious signs of infection etc so you should be doing ok by now. I know inside I’m NOT doing ok. Like you I was fit and active before this and I can barely do a thing now. I feel like all I do is ‘moan’ about how grim I feel and cry a lot about what is going on.
I am hanging my hopes on a return appointment to the consultant end of this week to plead for a scan or something to check what is going on inside. Either way I cannot drift on like this into long term pain and discomfort and inactivity. Sleep also evades me hence the timing of this reply.
9 weeks is still early days and maybe we are a couple of unlucky ones that really have to revise our expectations downward from the ‘norm’ and really understand what our own body is capable of or not. But if I were you, I would still keep pushing for help, can you get any physio or other advice or anything like that through GP or OH? At least that feels like you are trying to do something, rather than my biggest fear which is it’s just going to stay like this long term.
Really heartfelt hugs to you and keep us posted on how you are doing xJanuary 30, 2019 at 8:10 am #327558
Thanks for the reply Louise,
Hopefully you will get a scan at your appointment to check your healing. I’m sure having an open wound for so long will have prolonged your recovery and totally affected your activity levels, so please don’t be hard on yourself.
I empathise with insomnia too, maybe it’s discomfort making sleep uncomfortable for you but are you on HRT? Mine was increased last week as that can help sleep. I was stressed about not sleeping which is a vicious circle as then I didn’t sleep, ha!
I’m not sure what help to ask for, my gp was quite dismissive, the hubs was really supportive in the early days but they now see me as recovered and I’m left to do everything again, which as I said, is wiping me out. That in itself is making me sad 😔
I do wonder how I fitted everything in before the op as thinking about phasing back to work is daunting.
It’s like it’s hard to be kind to myself any longer as I should have recovered, I probably need some confidence coaching haha
Take care and keep me posted if you get an appointment
VikkiJanuary 30, 2019 at 10:14 am #327567
I feel for you both, it’s so much tougher than I thought too!
I’m 11 weeks today (TAH+BSO) and can honestly say it’s been such slow progress and I’ve been feeling pretty useless. I’ve been back and fore to the gp with a couple of UTIs and a wound infection. I try to walk daily but overdid it at the weekend (only 1 mile, up/down hill) and had the most painful lower back ache after, which has stopped me sleeping but thankfully its starting to ease again now. Everything seems to take so much more effort and twice as long!
I really thought I’d be feeling so much better by now. My gp has reminded me what a huge operation it is and that it will take months to fully recover and to be kind to myself! It’s not really what I want to hear but I’m going to slow things right down and maybe my body will be able to catch up a bit.
I hope you both start to feel stronger soon and just think how you were few weeks ago and I’m sure you’ll see how much progress you’ve made already.
Be kind to yourself ladies!
XxJanuary 30, 2019 at 12:08 pm #327569
Oh Louise hope you get to the bottom of it soon, you sound exhausted. As Vikki says maybe the hr t needs tweaked for sleep. Fizzer – i found that the abdominal exercises really help to clear lower back pain ( pelvic hollowing, tilt and knee rolls).
XxJanuary 30, 2019 at 7:01 pm #327572
Thanks all, it’s nice to read and get some support. Vikki, hope you are having a better day today.
Sorry to hear Fizzer, that progress is slow for you too, we will all get there in the end.
Draining is definitely the right description for the tiredness and discomfort, and it’s hard to get that across to gps and the like.
Thanks Felicity for your kind words, I’ll keep you posted on what the consultant says and whether there is anything that can be done or if I just need to be yet more patient !
I guess we should just focus on the very small wins for the moment and at least by the time summer comes, we should all be mended xJanuary 31, 2019 at 10:10 am #327576
Yea thanks ladies, whilst I wish you well soon, it’s reassuring to know I’m not alone feeling under recovered.
I’m glad there is support in your comments, thank you! I’m getting zero support at home, which pre op was normal, albeit frustrating. It all seemed to stop at that magic ‘6 week’ mark.
I do try to keep positive and be patient, like you say, focus on small steps and looking back I can see I’ve come a long way. I just feel emotionally very low.
Louise, hope you sorted an appointment?
Fizzer, you’ve had it far tougher than me, I applaud you for being strong 💪
Viks XFebruary 2, 2019 at 8:41 am #327594
Hi all, hope you’re managing in the snow, if you live in those parts of the world!
I saw my consultant yesterday and had an ultrasound scan. The good news is there does not appear to be anything wrong inside, so I can stop worrying about needing more surgery etc. But it does not give an explanation for how much discomfort I am in if I do anything at all. Apparently it may be to do with the problems I had with my open wound which has sunk very deep and healed that way so it may be pulling everything else in above it more than normal and creating the hard tender feelings above the wound when I stand up. Also nerves apparently grow back about eight weeks so may be why I’m feeling it more.
So no choice but to try and get on with it and hopefully things will slowly improve. Seems I am super sensitive to pain and discomfort (which I knew already tbh) and I just need to find ways to cope. I’m really glad of course that there is nothing seriously wrong but deflated at the thought of the long slow road ahead.
I’ll maybe search the forum a bit more to see if there are any other ladies in the past who described similar types of problems post-op, the internet doesn’t seem to offer too much info so far.
Anyway, do hope you are each getting on a little better and let’s try and stay positive huh ! XxxFebruary 3, 2019 at 4:44 pm #327601
I am 7 weeks post op and although making a good recovery, I think I have been doing too much, trying to build up my stamina in preparation for returning to work. I’m really not looking forward to going back (I’m a teacher and love my job usually) because I tire very easily at the moment and my tummy is sore and swollen still. Going back in 3 weeks time. Everyone at my work has been v understanding so I’m sure it will be ok. Hopefully going to increase HRT for hot flushes and brain fog.
I had TAH and BSO for large bilateral ovarian cysts. I think I’m still getting over the shock of it all! Thank you for your posts- it has been good to read about other people’s experiences as I had very little knowledge of the whole process.February 9, 2019 at 5:52 am #327618
Glad to have found your posts, I’m only 4 weeks post lap hyst and bso, removal of endometriosis and nodules on my spleen.
Everyone on the other post seems to be recovering so well and quickly! I was fit and healthy before and thought as it was laparoscopic it would be easier! I over did it on monday( by doing not very much) and have been back in bed most of the days since, although still going for a 20 min walk.
I can’t imagine going out in the car yet. I’m not taking painkillers but whole abdo muscles are tender and feel like I’ve gone back 2 weeks.
I certainly underestimated this surgery! Am trying to be patient and enjoy the time off work! I hope you are all feeling better since your original posts,February 9, 2019 at 10:56 am #327619
Just catching up with these posts!
Louise, glad you got some reassurance from the scan. That makes perfect sense about the wound, Hope you’ve made some improvements since you last posted? Also, very interesting about the nerves growing back around that time, it may account for my issues at that time too, thanks for that!
Cathmath, I’m a Primary teaching assistant and I’m like you said, usually love my job but feel sooo daunted at the thought of returning! I was referred to Occupational Health, which was a truly positive thing, the nurse was very knowledgable and supportive without me having to justify how I felt. With my headteacher I felt that looming pressure to be well!
I’m going back on a phased return, great, it’s 50%, not so great. I still tire quicker, wondering how will I do all the usual life stuff and work? Plus I’m an emotional time bomb, not dealing with ‘stressy’ situations at all well. I plan to try it but will definitely consult OH again if I’m struggling.
Cjn75, yes I agree with you, I had laprascopic thinking it would be easier recovery and totally undersestimated it too! I was just as you describe at 4 weeks, short walks, trying to do not a lot was hard. Thought I was doing great then had a blip around 8/9 weeks, hence this post! I’ve certainly improved since then but I’m definitely not 100%. I too focused on trying to be patient, and enjoying being off work. It’s not as easy as it sounds is it lol
Be kind to yourself ladies XFebruary 9, 2019 at 12:06 pm #327620
Week 8 – went back to work this week. Only half days and desk job but was exhausting! I have 45min drive each way which doesn’t help. It is surprising g when folk ask if you are now fully recovered as you look so well because no longer anaemic or carrying 4 month bump. When explain it takes months to fully recover you get odd looks from them. Hard to explain not in pain but in discomfort and that simp!e tasks use all available energy. Roll on summer we will all be new models by then xFebruary 9, 2019 at 1:37 pm #327621
Hi all, and welcome cjn75 to our little gang. While it’s not nice that we’re each struggling, it is a sense of relief (for me anyway) that we are not alone in our troubles.
I am making better progress, definitely the check up and scan helped me mentally to know that nothing was badly wrong and I needed to get on with how it feels. I have discovered that wearing Bridget Jones support knickers (!) are helping to stabilise my tummy and give me confidence to be up and about for longer. I managed a half day in the office this week which was a milestone but back to lots of resting now. I’m very tender and sore by the end of each day but it does all seem to settle overnight every night. Still only up to 15 mins walking a day but will gradually increase that next week if things are still going in the right direction.
I think we all know it is going to be much longer than we thought to get back to where we were, or hopefully to even better than we were, and we should be strong to make sure we are given the time we need whether that is by work, home, or whoever – and make sure we keep noticing the little improvements cos they definitely help to keep positive.
Do all keep in touch xxFebruary 9, 2019 at 5:49 pm #327622
I forgot to say- I had a laparotomy for my TAH- did anyone else have this? At nearly 8 weeks though, and HRT patches I am feeling so much better! Just a bit sore around the wound but it is healing well.
Hope you are all continuing to make progress and as you say Felicity, by summer, we will be feeling good!
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.